a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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Chuck norris

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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Knock knock "Who's there?" "Bark bark" "Bark Bark who?" "Bark bark bark bark bark bark."

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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Is your refrigerator running. Yes. Good, then I don't need to call an electrician.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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What is the difference between a Nigga and a bucket of shit? ....The bucket.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops