On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

Bob: Hey, hey Jim Jim: Yeah? Bob: Remember me. Jim: ...okay?? Bob: Knock knock Jim: Who's there? Bob: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FRICKIN REMEMBER ME!!!

Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

Betty White's wrinkly ass skin.

After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

Yo mama's so fat that she pushed you off your computer and you couldnt write anymore "yo Mama" jokes.

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Roses are black, Violets are black Everything is black I can't see

What's the difference between a woman? Apart from the differing reproductive systems and body organs, women are characterized by a need to create food.

What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

flavin's head

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

Two planes walk into an office building

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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