Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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A homeless man begged and begged for a dollar to buy something. A man finally gave him his dollar. What did the hobo buy? Nothing he walked into 711 and then got shot.

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What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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What do you call a joke book without a title? A joke book!!!!

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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