A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

thumb_up thumb_down -2

?J?o?k?e?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that moment, the Atheist cried out "Oh my God!...." Then the Atheist died a violent and terrible death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to go well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that when his wife was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas, despite that the tank was full and she only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrendous car accident that caused the fuel to empty and catch fire. Mary survived but their 6 month old baby was killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black guy seem so black next to a white guy? Because he had more melanin in his skin

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops