What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

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Knock Knock Come in! :)

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Losing a family member in 9/11.

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Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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How do you make a dentist cry? Rape him in the ass.

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a turtle walks into a bar and eats everyone

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Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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guest what i love pancakes

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

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What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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