Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a fat priest? Obese

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

BOB: Hey look its spiderman Spiderman: IT'S MANSPIDER!!! Punch! Kick! Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What can hitler cook well Steak

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What killed the name cool? Coolio

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops