What did the kid with no arms and no legs go for christmas? Cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, There's gas in your shower, Because you're a Jew. Love, Hitler

Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

Your sister's feet smell so bad people encourage her to go home and wash them.

A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

What ended the black family's picnic? Rain.

What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

whats the difference between my mom and your mom nothing they are both sluts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...