What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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what do you get if you put in a pan- a raw chicken, a lemon, assorted vegetables, onions, maybe some soy sauce, and a little olive oil then place this pan into an oven for around two hours, allowing the chicken to moisten. then serve with the assorted vegetable .supper.

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Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, and Chris Brown all walk into a bar. I don't know what the punchline is, but I'm pretty sure the cops are there.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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brittney griner

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

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4 men walk into a bar... Don't jump to conclusions! They were gay.

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

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Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

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Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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Bitch

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What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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