What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

If Jim lives in north carolina, what does that make his dad's brother? Black

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

What's black, white and red all over? Nothing, I'm colourblind.

Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

hey im leon and i love the chuckie

Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

Why are all of the cars in the left lane? Because you are in Winona MN.

Three men are travelling in a hot-air balloon, but it starts to go down over an uninhabitable desert. One of the men must sacrifice himself to save the other two by jumping overboard to reduce the weight in the balloon. Nobody is brave enough to volunteer, and they all die painful deaths.

how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

Bob and Joe are talking about how their grandfathers died in the Hulacaust. Bob says "Mine died in the gas chambers" Joe says "Mine got drunk and fell off the guard tower.

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

A Jew walks into Macy's

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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