What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

I asked a girl on a date. She said no.

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

Knock Knock! Whos There? Paul Okay I was expecting you

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

Why did the chicken cross the street? K

what did the apathetic person say? Who Cares?

What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

My Nan, that is all.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

Legal Mexicans in Texas

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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