You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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what do mexicans need to survive............. a truck load of herowin and BOARDERS!!!!!!!!

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What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

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women's rights

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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a disabled person walked into a bar..oh wait

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A black guy bought fried chicken and grape soda and decided to eat in the park. He had a sip of the grape soda and said "aaaaaaahhh grape drank!" There was a man dressed in a grape coustume drinking out of the fountain.

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

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Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses walk into a bar and sit down at a table. They glare at each other for a moment before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Your mama's so hairy, the only language she knows is wookie.

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

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My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

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who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops