Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

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EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

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Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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What happens when you leave Toby alone in your house? He eats your carpet, some pillows, ur dog, ned, neds dog and a glass panel. This is why 2 +h = plugger +Mount Everest (I is potato annoying). Bonjour.

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How do you kill a circus? Assuming this is metaphorical usage of the word 'kill', you would withdraw funds, involve the SPCA and offer all the major performers better contracts elsewhere.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Who Who who? Who who who Who who who who? Who who who who who who who who who who who who who who who…

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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My penis is big... not.

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If you had to go blind, would you go blind? If you said no, then you are wrong. You had to go blind.

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Whats wrong with that Nothing

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A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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