What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy. A 6 inch long 2 inch diameter syringe filled with heroin being injected into a woman.

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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hi bye

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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Y u do dis?

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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What's the difference between a fat person and a whale? The quality of the fat. -Japan

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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doctor: hey u ready to get home person: yea doctor: that sucks cause u have cancer

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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A black man, a mexican, and a christain are on an island. There are also many other people on the island, since all of North America and South America is one giant land mass.

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How do you stop a bus ? Put 3 small children in front of it Whats sad about 3 children who died in a bus crash ? They were my kids. How do you know if you're blind ? You run in to a wall

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops