Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Wanker

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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A man killed himself.

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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What's black and red all over? Half a cat

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Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops