What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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world peace

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

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What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

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Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

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Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

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What do you call a pile of dead children? Home

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops