So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

Where can you find elephants? That depends on where you leave them.

What's circular and round A circle

What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

Why couldnt Julia find her cat? she has gone crazy from old age, her cat actually died 10 years ago

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

Q- what the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? A- The Wheelchair

Why did no one throw a fridge at the boy on the swing? Because fridges are heavy.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

This is a haiku Haikus are not really jokes Congratulations!

what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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