Why can't Johnny ride a bike? Because Johnny is a potato.

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

Im taking a shit right now.

whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

Why did the guy eat his mom? people get hungry in this world

Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

What's worse than getting raped by a black guy? Getting raped by a radioactive black guy

knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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