Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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women's rights.

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did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

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Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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"I see," said the blind man to the deaf man.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

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Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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