Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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once upon a time, it snowed

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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You have cancer

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Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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There was an english man, and irishman and an pakistani sitting in a bar. What a wonderful example of racial & cultural differences bing put to one side while they are socialising in a friendly environment.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

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Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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How do u know that your obese ? People stare at you

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Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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What do you call a room full of Jews? A gas chamber.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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