Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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