Why did little Timmy start crying? Because he was shot.

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

What you reading? reading?

A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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