Knock knock! Ding dong.

Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

The Barackness Monster

Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

An 8 year old, a 9 year old, and jerry sandusky walk into a shower...

How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

This would be racist to black people if they could read.

What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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