A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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A man walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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