Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

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Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

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what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

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what do you call a monkey? a monkey

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Chicken penis.

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Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

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what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

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A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

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How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

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What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I'm Color Blind F*CK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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