Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? Although being a much easier potential victim, no one has raped the mentally challenged man.. yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

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TOBUSCUS

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

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What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Whats fleash color flesh color and fleash color? a hodo rolling down a hill.

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troll----> hahaha---->

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

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How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops