A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

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Your mamas so poor she cant even afford to support a family

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What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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