What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

black chicken. kfc

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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