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Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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haha

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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Cancer.

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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