Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

roses are red turtles are random. cancer

Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...