Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

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What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Why are the black people in Africa dying? Because the poverty rate is high and they don't have enough money to by simple things like medicine and mosquito nets to prevent AIDS, Malaria, and other infectious diseases.

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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