The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

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A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops