A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Your ancestors called. They want their glasses back!

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops