What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

Paddy Englishmen, Paddy Irishmen and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. They realise that they all share a common name and make a casual joke about it.

Michael Jackson will always be remembered for touching...the hearts of many.

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

Your mom is so old she died

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

What does the average fishermen catch Fish

Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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