Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

Who invented apple? God

A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

How did Chris die? Bush-fire

Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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