3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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1+1=2

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Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

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how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

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What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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69

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ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops