I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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How many blonds douse it take to change a light bulb I dont know it hasn't happened yet

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

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A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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