Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

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Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

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Why did the black man shoot the white guy? the white man was about to hurt the black mans family.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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