What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

your sister has 1 boob thats funny

My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

zx

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

Why do black people have white hands and feet? Regardless of race or ethnicity, the skin on the palms and soles of the feet is always less pigmented than elsewhere on the body. In darker skinned people this fact is readily observable, but in light skinned people this feature of human biology cannot normally be discerned by simple visual inspection.

there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

YOUR MOTHER IS SO FAT that she sought a relevant support group. My understanding is that she tried Overeater's Anonymous and lost a few pounds, but it meant more that it improved her sense of self-worth. She's more comfortable with herself as a somewhat overweight woman, and a much happier person now. We're all very proud of her.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...