Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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Whats worse than being rapped by a giant scorpion. Being gangbanged by a couple giant scorpions

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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I drive a 'rarri

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops