What did the big pickle say to the little pickle? "I'm black."

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What's worse than a paper-cut? Two paper-cuts. What's worse than two paper-cuts? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three paper-cuts.

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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The foreskin of a baby gorilla

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What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

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What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

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What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

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What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

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Future last words Guess who edition: "This new prototype Ferrari XZ handles like a God even at full speed!...Well, if God had no brakes and his turning ability suddenly disappeared when going at over 300 kilometers per hour that is..." "Uh oh now! Another heart attack! Where is mah medical weed? SHAAAAAROOOOOOON!" "Please haters, lower your guns, I will stop singing! Beliebe me!" Moral: "OMG I AM ONLY THE SIXTH MOST USELESS THING NOW!" "MY BODY IS NOT READY! Urgh mah chest... CHAROOOOOOON!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops