What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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