- Anti Joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

sweating like antoni with a girl

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!