Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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roses are red violets are blue

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

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why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops