A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a hispanic guy are standing before a cliff. They proceeded to take lovely pictures.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple that got hit by a bus.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops