Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

thumb_up thumb_down +42

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops