Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

sorry got to poo

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

bish bash bosh giz a nosh

why cant dogs write letters? They do not have the dexterity to hold a pen, or even comprehend the basic language skills and grammatical layout of how to write a letter

There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

96 there mad at each other instead its 69

What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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