Your mom is so fat that she actually had a pretty hard time finding a husband.

There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

Whats the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari? The Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

autsim

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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