Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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Womens rights

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i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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