I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...