my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

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Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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Roses are red violets are blue I have outsimers Wait what?

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What's 9+10? 19

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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While I was having sex... Just kidding, I can't get laid.

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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poop

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

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What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

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Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday just dance 3

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Why did the boy cross the street He didnt he got hit by a plane instead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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